strength in my weakness

This is a giant picture blog with pictures of most of the good times this year had. Only "most" of them, because the best times we had i wasn't taking pictures of course!
and im not saying that these pictures can truly represent all the good times i've had this year, but they do an alright job and i love looking at them anyway.


this is from rachel's birthday party way back in january. carly and i were playing around with our cameras and i got this amazing shot of her while she wasn't paying attention



this is from disciple now back in... march? i think so.
we didn't win, but we definitely had the most fun and we beat freshman boys at eating spam, yes! haha


i took this while we were at Summit in Jacksonville, Florida. (april)
this was during one of our many expeditions to Steak'n'Shake, which is the best fast-food place in the world. aside from dions. Steak'n'Shake, when are you coming our way?

i remember one quiet night as i was walking along the river in jacksonville with my family, i told God that i loved Him, and He told me He loved me back. I told Him i would do anything for Him, and 2 months later He sent me to Portland, Oregon.


There were waaay too many pictures i had of portland for me to choose one that really represented the whole thing, and none of my pictures really do anyway, so these two are the best you get. This is of me and Selah, whom i nicknamed Booger. I babysat her while the rest of the kids moved The Door church out of the 5th floor of a building in downtown Portland. Not an easy feat... i seem to remember someone accidentally knocking a bouncy ball out the window where it fell 5 stories and hit someone in the head... haha!


Portland again, taking some apples home for breakfast and waiting for the downtown train to pick us up.

Portland was definitely the high point of my year and I hope to go again this year...

awana camp. good times.


jumping up and down and dancing in the street near downtown Alb one friday night... remember Viv?

i couldnt not put this picture in. It was nearing the end of summer, we were sitting outside of dions (where else?) being loud and crazy as usual.
(yes, evie dropped courtney)



Sleeping on a trampoline in august



katelin reading The Pigeon Wants a Puppy.
not anymore!



this was taken the night we were at marissas house and got into a giant wrestling war on the trampoline. one of my absolute favorite memories!


taken during awana. I think this picture does a very good job of summing up all that really happens during verses. eat that, leaders! :P



a definitive small group picture



bubble blowing contest at dions


playing singstar when i visited Clinton down at State. His friends are so crazy and make everything fun.




and finally, me with some pocket pals. This year was the first that i really took those things seriously; this year was the start of something very good.


so as you can see, I had a very good year despite all my griping and complaining, haha. I have learned so much and i have grown so much, and this is not even close to being an ending, because this coming year is (hopefully) only gonna be better.
and if its not better, well God makes us strong in our weakness and persecution, right? I love that verse. People have died and people have moved away (figuratively and literally), but i am still strong and God still loves me.



.... wonder what next year will bring?
we'll find out

debate exposes doubt

I re-did lauras sweatshirt.
she didnt like it because it was "tacky", haha.

(well, it kind of was)

before:
thats the back
thats the front.


and then now:

and

...ive had a small obsession with hearts lately.



this sweater was from a national awana competition in 2006- the best one we ever had, in fact.
but anyway, laura thought the chili's were a little much.
(actually i did the same thing to my sweater some time ago)
(only mine doesnt have the hearts)

i think the monsters teeth are too big and its smile is too lopsided.
and the hearts dont really go with the monster.
what do you think?




Todays Theme Music:
this charming man- cover by dcfc
over the mountains- eisley

cover what you can

Im having a pretty good break.

Christmas was good, how was yours?

This was my favorite thing i got that i asked for-

Eisley macbeth shoes.

Sherri DuPree drew the designs for them, just in case you were wondering :)


Also i got a laptop, which was a big suprise.
im very thankful for it though, since im thinking about going to nm state in the fall.
(and when i say im thinking about going, that means that i really really want to go, haha)

im thinking i just want to get away, for a while.


everyone ready for the new year?
(can you believe that stores are already setting up for valentines day?)
i am. classes are set up, ive registered to graduate with the other homeschooled kids, life is good right now. (hope it keeps up that way...)
im thinking my classes will be easier. No science, not much math.
mostly conceptual stuff, i s'pose. and memorization. But as long as its interesting, its nothing i cant handle.

And im going to a new years eve party, which im excited for. I think its always better to bring in the new year with people you love :)





Todays Theme Music:
anything by copeland, but mostly
im safer on an airplane
the last time he saw dorie
when you thought youd never stand out
sleep

and
new soul- Yael Naim

i celebrate the day

And with this Christmas wish is missed
The point I could convey-
If only I could find the words to say to let You know how much You've touched my life!
Because here is where You're finding me, in the exact same place as New Year's eve,
And from a lack of my persistency
We're less than half as close as I want to be...

And the first time
That You opened Your eyes did You realize that You would be my Savior?
And the first breath that left Your lips,
Did You know that it would change this world forever?

And so this Christmas I'll compare the things I felt in prior years-
To what this midnight made so clear
That You have come to meet me here

To look back and think that
This baby would one day save me
In the hope that what You did
That you were born so I might live
To look back and think that
This baby would one day save me

And I celebrate the day
That You were born to die
So I could one day pray for You to save my life

be what you mean

I got blog-tagged. again.

this time it was:
1) go to the 4th folder in your computer where you store your pictures

2) pick the 4th picture in that folder

3) post it on your blog and explain it

here is the picture:

This was from Evies last night at awana, and they were talking and looking at music or a book or magazine or something. I really love this picture because it has two of my very best friends for LYFE in it, and its such a good representative of what we do best. and who knows what that is....!


you are tagged

ready for christmas

here is the lobster i made for Clinton. Think he'll like it? (no idea why he wanted a lobster in the first place, haha....)
i also got him a gigantic nerf gun. its the biggest present under our little 'christmas bush'!


And, here is a picture of Clinton and his pie-

He got a how-to-make-pie book for Christmas from his friend Jessica down at nm state, so while Ian was here we decided to try it out.
Doesn't it look fancy? lattice crust top with little crust hearts.
(you cant see the hearts too well in the picture though)

its so nice having Clinton home.

:)







Todays Theme Music:
mr pine- eisley
head against the sky- eisley

we're too strong to compromise

I made 27 little monsters for all the kids in my small group. It took me about 3 weeks, but i got it done.
Then I'm making a lobster for clinton (its a suprise, so shush), a monster for Clintons friend Ian, a monster for Heidi, and a pocket person for Hal.
still so busy... just a different kind of busy. a better kind of busy :)

im concerned about my grades. I very well may have failed my chemistry class. I reallly really really hope i got a 'C', haha im such an underachiever. oh well, God still loves me right?

Also, Clintons friend Ian has been visiting these past few days and just left about 20 minutes ago. Ian goes to NM State with Clinton, but the rest of the time he lives between Soccorro and Pietown, pretty much in the middle of nowhere. Entertainment-wise, the best thing to do is go to Soccorro, and thats about 45 minutes away.
(and the best thing to do in Soccorro is Wal-Mart. Ouch.)
In spite of living in the middle of nowhere, Ian is a character. He's eccentric and so crazy its amusing.
So it was pretty fun having him here. He was kinda sorry to go, because the best thing to do over there is watch tv. poor, poor kid.

Time to go watch Aladin.
and make a lobster.







Todays Theme Music:
helena- mcr
second skin- the gits
dogs can grow beards all over- dtwp

pretty much anything really fast-paced

boyfriend pillow

jordan, you literally made me laugh out loud when i saw this:


and yes, i want one too

not one speck will remain

im done.









Todays Theme Music:
head against the sky- eisley
the sound of settling- death cab for cutie
chemicals collide- cloud cult

chain reaction

I woke up at 4:40am today to go to Smith Lake.
it was a mission trip to a reservation about 2 hours drive from here. It was a big Christmas thing- we put together boxes of food for Navajo families, made crafts with kids, and ate with them and hung out with them. It was pretty cool.



Rachel and Missa and I rode in Danielles car on the way there. We killed the boredom of the long boring drive by singing songs from Fiddler on the Roof. And reminiscing about The Neverending Story, Danielle giving us driving pointers, random comments. good times

When we got there, we were all split into different groups with different tasks, such as putting rice, beans, and flour into ziplocks and then putting those into boxes to give to families who needed them.

Shelby and i sorted beans. We also came up with an idea to make lots and lots of money. Raisin Bean cereal! Its like corn flakes and bran flakes, but instead itll be bean flakes. Theyre cheap, so we can make a lot of it, mix raisins in, and sell it at health food stores for top dollar. yummy!
just might work, right?

Anyway, we all had a great time at smith lake. I am so thankful to God that He lets me do stuff like this that changes my life for Him.
I worry about stuff way too much. Its only times like today that I realize ive been truly blessed.



(God has a plan for you, too)






Todays Theme Music-
walk on water- audio adrenaline
everybody here is a cloud- cloud cult
holiday- green day

we will soar

I went ice skating with some toastmasters kids today. It was pretty amazing.
and i did not fall down. pwned!

basically what happened was this-


1) We chunked around the ice, making jokes, laughing loud, and looking like retards cause we were anything but graceful.


2) we took lots of pictures. Sam struck manly poses (the same every time); paul stealing the attention by crashing in the backround.

3) and-
yeah... i dont know.


Afterwards we went to Dions. where else?
And we played Egyptian, and i won as usual.

hahahahaha....

the end.


(tomorrow im going on a day mission trip to Smith Lake. cannot wait to see how that turns out)






Todays Theme Music:
falling down- atreyu
because its named after the indian kid in The Neverending Story
and
blacking out the friction- death cab for cutie
because its finally starting to feel christmassy here, weather-wise
and
on wings of integrity- my children my bride
because theyre amazing

the end.... (almost)

Today was our last small group for the year.
And also extended night of worship, which is always cool. A good time to truly experience God and love Him for who He is, no matter what He may be doing in your life.

I am comforted to know how close we are to the end of the year. I can't wait for it to all be done already, to be just quickly over.
I'm especially looking forward to the end of school, seeing as how ive got a 65% avarage in chemistry... lol.
math and science are just not my thing.
is that excuse good enough? hope so.

i actually had an open book lab final. it was amazing.
it seems as if my lab teacher and my lecture teacher switched personalities but kept the same body. My lab teacher seems really gruff, but hes so lenient and cool, and my lecture teacher seems nice, but hes really uptight and makes things hard. (this is me trying to blame my grade on him...lol)

Im just glad that through everything, God has been there for me. This entire semester, while school's just been showing me how dumb i am, God has been showing me that He can use that for something.

i have a purpose, and a feeling that no words can express
:)




Todays theme Music:
nickels is money too- tdwp

facing the facts

Im pretty good at hiding from reality, but there comes a point where you cant hide anymore.
one of my best friends is moving away in just a week, and im facing the facts.
i wish it could last forever, finals and all...
but i know it wont.


im scared.

so far away from all we've known

The chaos has begun.
I had a precalc test last thursday, chemistry and physics tests today, and then i have a lab final wednesday, math final tuesday, chem final wednesday...
yuck.

Today i realized that i get distracted and space out really fast. I start out reading, and then i have one of those relaxed moments where im thinking of something funny or im daydreaming, and then i notice that my paper is blurry and i focus in and start reading again.
I did that like five times during my chemistry test today, just a little weird.

i cant wait for the weekend to get here, im going ice skating with some kids from toastmasters.



Anybody remember this?
that was such an amazing day.













Todays theme music:
jesus in the southern sky- kellin quinn
set it off like napalm- emarosa

we dont look back dahling, it distracts from the now

An interesting Toastmasters meeting today. Kind of emo. Kind of deep.
People actually cried. It was weird. I didnt like it much... i spose it was the result of finals and too many classes; too much studying, lol.

Afterward my 'rents and I went out looking for a Christmas tree... at 4 different places. Thats right.
My parents weren't about to spend 40+ bucks on a tree (i wouldnt either. i was all for the charlie brown tree) so they decided to go look at fake trees. After spending nearly an hour at Lowes and the prospect of spending equal to if not more than that time at Michael's comparing prices, i decided to head over to Borders instead.
I've been dying to read that new twilight book.
Dont get me wrong- i am not one of those hardcore twilight fans. Those books are totally overrated.
But ive read the other three books and i just gotta know what happens, lol.

Can you believe how much Twilight junk they have out there now? In addition to the books, theres t-shirts, bookmarks, posters, jewlery like the actors wore in the movie, books about the actor that plays edward, even giftcards.
its crazy.


Tuesday we got the news that theres gonna be no summit this year, so I can do the homeschool graduation thing that Clinton did. And i made it into the honor society at the last minute (by the skin of my teeth), so i get to wear one of those dorky red shoulder scarf things. but im excited about it anyway :)

Also i finally saw Wall-E. I loved it.
a cute movie about a sad, dumpy little robot that just wants to hold hands with a sleek new robot. I love his house, how its decorated with a bunch of stuff that people would think is totally useless, but when you bring it together it looks amazing.
and its totally hilarious how all the humans are obese and just slide around on the floor.

ughh. i'd better go study for finals. im so sick of this. ive had an awful semester. After the 18th im just gonna forget about all of it and sit around and make stuff all day.
its gonna be amazing



Today's Theme Music:
death of an interior decorator- dcfc
time of your life- green day

i am just a speck of dust inside a giants eye

I was blog-tagged to do the '10 things about me' blog:


1) i dont like the taste of water

2) i went on a life-changing mission trip to Portland, Oregon last spring

3) ive never broken a bone or had stitches

4) i suck at math

5) i love making things using any medium, especially cloth (felt)

6) i have strong thighs (haha)

7) i like things simple- i dislike fancy clothes, fancy foods, fancy parties, fancy anything

8) ive kissed a cow tongue

9) i love tree houses

10) i enjoy shopping for groceries with my dad



anyone who read this is now blog-tagged.
have fun



Todays Theme Music:
reinventing your exit- underoath
i like giants- kimya dawson

a milestone

This is Miles.

I named him that cause he's a big milestone for me; my first real order.
Danielle Gawronski was visiting a friend in OK City, and she brought hansel and leisel, her pocket pals, with her. I guess her friend liked them so much that she decided to buy some, so she contacted me via Facebook and ordered a panda and an elephant. I already had the panda, so Miles was the only special order- my very first :)




Todays Theme Music:
all i want is you- barry louis polisar
winter song- eisley


Also, evie bought me cloth.
it doesnt get much better than this

all my balloons are popping

thats how i did josh's sweater.
its designed to look like a monster is eating his head. It didnt turn out quite as i hoped it would, but im ok with it.

Things are really taking off. My frauline, Danielle, is visiting friends in OK City and sort of "advertised" for me out there, and now I have an order from her friend out there for two pocket pals ($10 each). This will be my first "official" sale, so im really excited about it!
Also im taking Intro to Business at CNM next semester, so hopefully that'll help me out.

I have an idea for drawing on a pair of white shoes. So if anyone has white shoes and wants them to look like a foot monster, let me know.


I can't stop listening to this song:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_1mGzNHiyiA&feature=related
when christie dupree puts out a cd i will be one of the first to buy it.



Todays Theme Music:
this town, a town so obtuse- wesley jensen/ christie dupree
tire swing- kimya dawson
all my balloons- children 18:3

i love it when it rains all day

We usually go over to my grandmas house for thanksgiving, but today they came over here. My aunt carol came too, and also my cousins Bryan, Leon, Crystal, and Carolyn, and her little boy Dean.
Full house.
I love company, especially on holidays. Bryan and Leon are absolutely crazy and a lot of fun to hang out with. They told funny stories about how they used to put batteries in cameras and fix it up so that it shocks you when you take a picture, and also about the time that Leon pushed Bryan down our stairs like 7 years ago and he smashed right into our atrium.
(they told that one because Dean was going up the stairs when he wasnt supposed to and he ended up falling down and landing on his head in such a way that I thought for sure he would break his neck. yep it was a party, haha)

So you know whats crazy? Instead of getting tattoos, nowadays lots of people are getting brands. Like cattle brands. This is pretty much the dumbest thing I've heard of people doing (lately)- one of my friends was saying that he personally branded a friend of his. They just bent a coat hanger up in the shape he wanted, put it in the fire, and branded him.
Only they branded him on the stomach and his skin stretched, so what was supposed to be his high school football team name ended up looking more like the American flag. haha serves him right.


On saturday pretty much all my moms side of the family is coming over for our traditional "craft day": my moms present to all her neices and nephews. They all come over and make christmas crafts. It sounds lame, but its actually tons of fun having all the cousins together. Its pretty much the only time i see them anymore.
And we go outside and play football or hide and seek, or whatever the kids want to play. And eat nachos.



exactly a year ago i was in my cousin Yvette's quincenera with my cousin Richard. I was just thinking today about how much fun that was. I thought it was a big pain at first because we had to meet for weeks before to learn this traditional dance thing, but it was worth it.
I miss seeing everyone every week like that.






Todays Theme Music:
crayon angels - fleet foxes
everybody here is a cloud- cloud cult
this town, a town so obtuse- wesley jensen/christie dupree

i exaggerate a lot

Clinton is home :)


Now it feels like Thanksgiving.
i guess i didnt realize how much i missed him.

I have a cold. and i have to go to school. if i die, dont wear black to my funeral.
Actually, wear whatever you want. Only wear something you really like.



Todays Theme Music:
with a little help from my friends- the beatles
on distant shores- five iron frenzy

chainsaw brutality. tornado strength.

After two months of waiting in anticipation, I finally went to the underoath concert last night!
Jordan picked me up at about 6:10 and we listened to The Sound of Separation on the way there, to "prepare", lol.
We had to wait in line for like 45 minutes. and it was COLD, but totally worth it. These people came by and handed us free Saosin posters. We jumped up and down to keep warm, and joked with the random people in line behind us. good times :)

It was a good show too. I think i liked The Famine the least, but the devil wears prada totally made up for that! It was really intense in the crowd, though. We were so tightly packed that i couldn't raise my hands above my head, and at times i literally could not breathe because I was so smashed against the person in front of me. I felt like half my hair got ripped out too, haha. They played all the songs I wanted them to play. Everyone in the crowd was screaming out the lyrics as loud as they could; it was really cool.

We went up on the balcony for Saosin to get a good break, and then when underoath came on a lot of people went down into the crowd, so we got all the good seats on the balcony.
I loved how underoath opened with Breathing in a New Mentality.

And I really liked how all the bands mentioned that all their music went out to God, and also how Spencer gave his testimony.

That show was just amazing.
period.





Todays Theme Music:
youre ever so inviting- underoath
tree tops- eisley
nice for you- neon horse

i love eisley

obsession

1) Its 'Write love on your arms' day.
just in case you didnt notice.



2) the photo shoot got canceled. :( I guess josh was gonna borrow some lights from this one guy, but the guy lent the lights to someone else who didnt return them on time. so when josh went to get the lights, they werent there, and who knows when they'll be returned, so the shoot has been temporarily postponed. So now im doing nothing this friday, when originally i was gonna take tickets at Creation Fest and then canceled that b/c i was gonna do the shoot.
lame!


3) I really really need to buy underoath tickets. soon.


4) Finally finished Lukes pocket person, after like a month or so. I got kinda burnt out on it about 2 weeks into making it, so i stopped working on it after i ran out of thread. but yeah, its done now. I guess im making Katelyns next, but i dont know when i can get myself to start on it. I get kinda sad in a strange way after finishing a pocket pal. Its like another little piece of me is popping out into existence, however cheesy that may sound.
I really cant wait till this becomes all i do.
its a crazy obsession of mine.




Todays Theme Music:
second skin- the gits

very jackson pollock-y

Thats the backround for the photo shoot on Friday!
I'm so excited.




Todays Theme Music:
they all surrounded me- eisley
good morning fire eater- copeland
spartan- five iron frenzy

i think not...

Before class today, this one guy was talking about how after he graduates hes gonna join the army and get shipped off to Iraq. He said, "I cannot wait"; he was actually excited about it, because apparently when he was a little kid he would spend his allowance on black powder and blow stuff up. I guess he thinks Iraq will be the same.
I dont know about you, but ive read a lot of war novels, and even with that small understanding of what war is like, I can tell that it is NOT a desirable situation to be in. I've heard war described as hell. Who really enjoys war, anyway? Im sure i wouldnt...
War is not cool, war is not fun, war is not safe, war is not happy.
and those are not reasons for wanting to go to Iraq.

Sometimes war is necessary, though.
I would respect the guy a lot more if he had said that he was excited to go to Iraq to help our country and the people over there instead of saying that he was excited to blow stuff up.
People die in wars.

That guy is a fool.

the same old thing

Back from Los Cruces.
We ended up staying till Sunday, but it was ok. I didn't mind.

Saturday was definitely the best day I've had in a long time. We woke up and went to the Farmers Market, which was a lot different from Portlands', but still pretty cool. Then around 11:30 mom and dad dropped me off at the campus to have lunch with clinton. It was kinda funny, because they all stay up really late and then sleep really late, so we had to go around and wake up all Clint's friends, which is apparently what he does every day. It was actually kind of amusing, becasue at our last stop this kid named Ian didn't want to get out of bed, so they pretty much all jumped on him and wrestled him to the floor and dressed him. And then they all apologized like I wasn't used to that kind of thing, lol.

I like the fact that they always eat together. Clinton pretty much has two families, one here and his friends at school. They're pretty close; they tolerate each other pretty well and never seriously bring anyone down.
They like to play pool while they eat. Thats their favorite thing to do, and they're all pretty good at it. Ian even went out and bought his own pool stick.
So after Clinton and i smothered them at pool (haha) we went and played singstar in one of the guy's room, and i ended up hanging out for an overall 5/6 hours! (which is why that day was so amazing) After which we went and ate dinner with mom and dad since it was dad's birthday.

I approve of Clintons friends. They're not christians, which is concerning for clinton, but they're pretty cool anyway. I bet God put Clinton there so that he could witness to them.
The only one of his friends that I don't really like is his roommate, Justin. When we first met him (when his mom was around, that is) there was no swearing, no dirty jokes, etc. He claimed he was a Christian and everything, too. But now, two months into college, he swears every other sentance and talks crap. Clinton says he rents a lot of really bad movies.
If this guy was really a Christian like he said he was at the start of the school year, he would love God. And if he loved God, he wouldn't do all this stuff that God hates. Thats a pet peeve of mine.

But i was glad we went. Good times :)




Todays Theme Music:
escaping song - eisley
such great heights - the postal service

safe no matter what

Ugh.
I had another run-in with Awkward Guy today.

I was walking down the little path at CNM to get to the cafeteria, and i was trying to hurry cause the wind was so cold it took my breath away. But as i was approaching the parking lot, I saw Awkward Guy, and i REALLY hoped that he didn't see me, so quickly turned to walk away. I've done this successfully 2-3 times before and escaped without him seeing me (i think), but not so today! He waved and stumbled over, and so we made arrangements for another study session after his class.

And then, just as i thought a study session with Awkward Guy could not get one bit more awkward, it DID. He confronted me on turning away from him as if to run away. And he also asked me if i even liked studying with him.
And of course i was an idiot and replied, "of COURSE i like studying with you! whatever could make you THINK that i was going to run away when i saw you??"

I just cant stand to hurt people. Even Awkward Guy. He's pretty nice; he doesn't deserve it- its just that if he wasn't so awkward i totally wouldn't mind study sessions or anything.
sigh.

Anyway, the BEST part of my day was right after Awkward Guy (shudder) went to his class before our study group thing-
I finally got to the cafeteria and this other kid from our chemistry class was there and asked if i could help him with his math homework. He thought i was a tutor at Main campus cause he saw me writing on a board in a study room there, but he quickly found that i am just as clueless at math as he is cause i couldn't help him with his algebra even though I'm in pre-calc.
But we started talking, and I actually got to witness to him! It was really amazing- ive been praying for an opportunity like this for a long time. It was the best part of my day :)


Also-
im really glad I went to first wednesday today. That guy that did the little communion speech said JUST the thing that I needed to hear- i was almost crying during worship cause I've been feeling so broken lately, so it was amazing to hear (once again) how Jesus gave himself so that I can be whole.
i love that.



Todays Theme Music:
fractions- emery
the ponytail parades (acoustic)- emery
on the safest ledge- copeland

a sight to behold

Got my senior pictures today :)
i really like them. my parents don't, but that was to be expected i guess.
it was nice having josh take them, cause he made it fun. It would have been pretty awkward if someone else had taken them... (shudder). I'm not good at talking to people I dont know :P



im thinking this would be the one to put
in my graduation cards.

its one of my favorites :)





Also, this weekend we're going to visit Clinton! yay :D
im more excited about this trip. I told clinton about how I didn't really enjoy the last visit because it seemed like I didn't get to hang out with him much, so this time I'm going to eat lunch with clinton and his friends instead of with mom and dad.
Im happy about that.
And we're only going to be down there for Friday and Saturday morning, so maybe I'll get to go to church sat. night, which makes my week even better :)

Oh- clinton also said that he would help me sell some pocket pals, so we're gonna try that out this weekend!


Those are the ones I'm gonna sell. I think Clinton's putting them on Ebay, but im not quite sure. But anyways, im excited about that cause now i'll have funds for underoath and christmas :D



Todays Theme Music:
nice for you- neon horse
I-W-I-N- starflyer 59
over the mountains we go- eisley

(im REALLY excited about eisley's new album coming out (hopefully) soon)

fully alive

I never thought I'd be the kind of person that talks about God all the time and can't stop, but that's what I've become.
Now I can see that it's definitely not a bad thing, but sometimes I have to tone it down a bit so that non-christians aren't turned off to God. I would hate for me to be the cause of someone turning away from Him.

God is pretty much my life. Without Him, I know I wouldn't be the person I am- i would be much worse and far more desparate. Without God, i may as well not even be alive.
Without God, i am basically dead.

I suppose thats why I love my church friends so much. They love God like I do.
Last week someone asked me what ive been up to aside from church stuff and school.
I haven't been up to anything except church and school, really. School you can't escape from, and church stuff is what helps me survive school. So thats pretty much my life. Is that a bad thing?
I think not. I like my life the way it is :)



Todays Theme Music:
i feel good - eisley
fault line, a fault of mine- underoath
change is hard - she&him

staring into space

I've been thinking about portland a lot lately. I dont know why.
I used to pray for the people we met there all the time after we got back, but i haven't lately. I really don't want to fall from that habit, so I've made it a point to visit the Oregon blog (you can see it if you scroll down the page, right above my picture, if you want to read more about it and pray too) once or twice a month so that ill remember.
i find it easier to remember to pray when I can see all their faces...

Portland was definitely the high point of my year, and a turning point in my life. God has given me such a passion to help the homeless- all the homeless, everywhere. Not just Portland.
Though I am such a hypocrite. I kick myself every time I see a bum on the side of the road and i realize i forgot to put food, or, at the very least, water in the car so I could give it away.
You get such kicks from helping them out. Seriously.
Try it.

But yeah anyway, I really miss portland. I cant wait to go back... i'm most definitely going next year, even if its the only thing i do the whole summer.


oh yeah (this is kinda random) but i think my parents ordered my eisley shoes today! I asked for them for christmas, and my "christmas wish list" is sitting right here by the computer. heh heh heh. http://www.veganessentials.com/catalog/bronson-eisley-studio-project-slip-on-by-macbeth.htm
check them out. arent they great? :D



Todays Theme Music:
when you thought you'd never stand out- copeland
heads or tails, real or not- emarosa

stacy dupree is my friend on facebook. i know you're jealous.

I have a Chemistry test on Wednesday.
And im actually studying for it. You should be proud of me.

yesterday we (TEEN GIRL SQUAD) got our costumes for the small group party! We went to savers :P I got what danielle would call a chola outfit, lol. Its overalls without the overall.

Also on thursday I'm taking my senior pictures. I don't know how I feel about that- i hate getting dressed up, and I pretty much suck at getting pictures taken of me. It makes me feel awkward unless im doing something crazy.
But josh is taking them so i'm sure one or two will come out ok.
http://www.myspace.com/jmorsephotography
check it out!


Todays Theme Music:
great dj- the ting tings
you love to sing- copeland

album art

im excited :)

I'm going to be a hair model.
like a hand model, but with hair. Only im not going to wrap all my hair up so that its not exposed to light or the air or chemicals or nasty things. (hand models are known to get kinda crazy about not touching things)

Anyways,
one of my friends is a photographer and had this idea to tie my hair up with a blonde girls hair, and then (somehow, im a little fuzzy on the details) put that in front of a canvas painted with little creatures on it (i think). And StandBy Records is going to buy it for $1000 to use as album art for a random band (i actually dont think they've picked the band yet). So i'm gonna get $100 out of this, plus my hair will be on a cd's album art.
yay!

Also, Awkward Guy burned all the skin off the fingers of his left hand in lab, cause he accidentally leaned on a hot plate. And he had gloves on, so the plastic molded to his fingers and he had to rip it off.
gross!

im taking a math test tomorrow.
wish me luck.



Todays Theme Music:
im safer in an airplane- copeland
debate exposes doubt- dcfc

school friends? what school friends?

Have I told you about Awkward Guy?
I am literally hiding from him right now.

Josh Morse was pretty happy when i told him i know someone more awkward than him, though Awkward Guys awkwardness is a different sort of awkwardness than Josh's. Josh has an awkwardness that makes him likable because its funny. Awkward Guy has a kind of crazy awkward aura, and whenever I'm around him, I feel awkward too. Its the whole stuttering/loss for words/saying the wrong thing/shifty eyed/not knowing what to do with your arms and legs/i just wanna be your friend awkwardness. Its a different kind of awkwardness.
So i really dont like hanging around Awkward Guy, because i hate feeling awkward and i dislike being around people with this type of awkwardness.

The thing is, Awkward Guy always wants to hang out with me. I'm not the very hang-out-able type of person, unless you really know me, so i really have no clear idea why. I think its because Awkward Guy used to know my brother way back when.
Anyway, without fail, every monday after chemistry he will walk up to where im sitting and ask if i want to study after his class (at 1:30). And i am obliged to say "yes", because
1) if you say "no" to Awkward Guy, he will be depressed
2) i actually need the help

Only last week i was studying with a friend in the cafeteria and i forgot i told Awkward Guy that i would be in the library, and he was apparently searching for me everywhere until he found me. (which is kinda creepy). But anyways, today after i said i confirmed that i would study with him, Awkward Guy stuttered out, "You'll be there this time, right?", and i felt bad that i was so mean to him.
So here i sit in a corner- the very back of the library. There is a chance, however slight, that maybe Awkward Guy doesn't wanna study today :P





Todays Theme Music-
on wings of integrity- mychildren mybride

problem solving

i wish life would be like this:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fEf4psd9HTw&feature=related

haha. hahaha.





Todays theme music:
reinventing your exit- underoath

ugh

... i hate school

to god

thank you for putting me where i am
for giving me my friends
for always listening
for motivating me
for taking time to hear about my day
for being patient with me
for not ignoring me
for always knowing the best for me in any situation
for having a plan for me
for supporting my ideas
for always being there
for advising me at all times
for being my hope
for giving me confidence
for believing in me
for understanding me
for letting me truly experience you
for changing me
for helping me realize what i can do to help you
for not giving me more than I can take

you are my GOD

(and i love you)



todays theme music:
moving for the sake of motion- underoath

team lightening!

Today was epic. We went to a Turkey Bowl thing at Grace Church, where you split into teams and play hardcore games like brutal ball and cow tongue football.
Cow tongue football has got to be the best game ever. Our team totally pwned, and i have bloodstains on my shirt and jeans. Gotta love it!
We were team lightening. And we had this little lightening motion thing with our hands :)

Oh and i totally got taken out by a HUMONGOUS ball. When i opened my eyes, people were standing over me like, are you ok? it was pretty hilarious.
And we had a fire pit and roasted marshmallows (i had smores for the first time!) and jumped over fire and walked over hot coals; yknow, all the good stuff.
I'm bruised, I got elbowed in the face and taken out by a gigantic ball and been pounded in the face with a cowtongue- overall a pretty amazing day.


Today's theme music:
this town, a town so obtuse- wesley jensen
what am i to you? - norah jones
dogs can grow beards all over - tdwp