"and though the news was rather sad..."

So much has happened to me in the past 2 weeks that I somehow can't seem to remember any of it, or the important things at least, until I really begin thinking. Or maybe thats just because of this protective shell I've put over myself so that my emotions won't get the better of me...

I think the predominant thought of the moment is, "I wish I could be back in Portland." There is so much to do there, and we had so little time. But the time we did spend.... was life changing. And (I hope) not only to me.
Our main goal was to be Christ to the people of Portland. And not only to the homeless... but mainly.
What I noticed about Portland is that its pretty much split up into two worlds: you have your high-class, high-roller world, where everyone wears designer clothing and shops in all the expensive stores downtown; and you have your down-in-the-dirt world, where you have to beg and scrounge and work for the money for your next meal... or (as much as I hate to say it) the money to support your habit. These worlds are so different from each other, and they hardly connect at all. One day we had to dress up as hobos and pretend to be homeless, and the more "fortunate" people I encountered were such jerks. A lot of time we wouldn't get eye contact or attention from anyone; other times people were just flat-out staring. Very few people actually showed that they cared in the least.
And thats one of the reasons I feel compassion for these people- I somewhat understand (if only remotely) what these people deal with every day just by spending a few hours on the street, and yet the whole time I was thinking, "I can't wait till we can get back to the house and eat and wear our comfy clothes and be warm," when homeless people have no home to go to, no comfy clothes to wear, and they're hungry all the time.
Some of the people I met were so nice... and all I can think is that they don't deserve this. And a lot of the people I met just deal with it, and I'm so proud of them! This one lady, Madeline, is a wonderful example of dealing with everything life throws at you and following God at the same time. The first time I met her, I was working in the kitchen of the Transitional Youth, which was the street church we helped out at and met people at (my favorite part of serving in Portland). Madeline had been sick all day because she had to eat out of a dumpster the day before, and the food she ate was bad. But she was so sweet, she went to Transitional Youth that night and got some hot dogs (they gave out free food) for herself and her friends that couldn't come. Another time we met her on the Max (a train) and talked to her, and she was reading her Bible and talked to us about having a relationship with God when you're on the streets. She is quite amazing- one of the people I've been praying for every day.

If you asked me what I would do if I went back to Portland, I would do exactly what I did when I was there before- having one-on-one talks with the homeless to show them someone cares, and especially working at Transitional Youth. There was some atmosphere about that place that was absolutely wonderful. They give out free food and clothes, too. There was this one homeless family (heartbreaking, I know) that went the first night we were there. It was the night I was working in the kitchen, and man this guy mustve eaten 6 hot dogs with chili, 5 cookies, and two heaping bowls of ice cream. I can only imagine how little he actually eats when he's on the street, just to support his two little children.
Also it was cool just talking to the people at Transitional and hearing their stories. Some of them were kinda tragic, like their parents were deatbeats who did nothing but smoke and drink and beat them, so they ran away to live on the streets, because a life homeless is better than a poor life at home where no one cares. A lot of the time when street kids refer to their 'family', its not their real family- its people they've met while being on the street.
But not all of the homeless kids came from awful homes- some of them just simply ran out of money while traveling. One of the guys I met used to live in Alaska, and was traveling around seeing what there is to see when he became homeless. He was building a rocket at Transitional Youth when I was talking to him. I wonder how that went...

These homeless people don't have much going for them, but a lot of them have whats important- friends... close enough for them to call it 'family'. And you know, its not like these people are dead or anything. Theres always hope, and that lies in a relationship with God. And thats what I really really want to go back and show these people- they can be happy wherever they are in life, cause they have reassurance for the next. Madeline showed me that.

People you can pray for:
Seth, Dean, Madeline, George, Dean, Cyrus, the homeless family, Howard, and all of the homeless in Portland.