every thought a thought of You

havent done this in awhile. ive had better things to do. now dont you feel special?

(...just kidding)

ive been busy, but thats never a bad thing. i love being busy, summer break busy, still hard-at-work busy but not nearly as stressful as it was during school busy.

I've been working a lot. getting pretty good at making samiches and now i can do any kind of prep, and i can put the cucumber/bell pepper/ onion slice-y thing together all by myself.
whooo.
its a pretty fun job, though, probably because of the crazy people i work with. everyone has their own story, and they're all pretty different.
Helen just moved here last year from Alabama. she came to subway just a month or two afterward and has been working there ever since, and she still doesnt know anyone here but the people at work.
Kristine is 20 and is married and has a 14 month old. her family went through a whole bunch of religeons while she was growing up so now she's just decided that she believes in God and thats all. she hates religeon.
zach works as a medic at kirtland air force base. subway is his second job and he hates it. today they were playing with fake blood.
...............
zalo, larue, erica, anthony, peggy....
etc etc etc.

they're all crazy. and eccentric. but they keep things interesting and thats the way i like it.


My graduation party was on saturday. it was stressful to plan and set up for, but in the end im thinking it was worth it. Laura's parents showed up, i was kind of suprised. it meant a lot to me that they showed up. also that bryan and leon showed up, i love spending time with those two. They're practically my brothers. We had a lot of fun and they stayed for two hours afterward talking.
i dont know why, but i kinda thought Richard might be there. found out recently that they brought him home so he could see my grandpa once more before he died, and so i guess i thought if they brought him back for that they could bring him back again... foolish i guess. but i was a little disappointed nonetheless.
i miss him. wish i had been there that night they brought him to see my grandpa.

bryan was just here visiting, actually. he said that he might go move to seattle sometime soon, just because he wants to live somewhere where its cool and rainy. i told him he should live in Portland instead. If he moves, im going to visit him for a while. It would be cool if its portland; i want to revisit all the familiar spots.
been missing portland a lot lately.

i think i just want to go on a trip, somewhere, anywhere, if only for the day. can't wait till camp, just to get away for awhile out in the woods, look up at night at all the stars and the milky way looking back at me as if to remind me of how much God loves me, and how He's involved in every little thing and always will be.

Sometimes when im driving the truck or the van, i look at how much gas there is left and i think of how far i could get on that. i think of however many dollars i have in my wallet on the seat next to me, how much gas i could buy with it, how far i could get on that in addition to whats in the tank. and i think of the growing roll of bills in my pig bank at home, how long i could live off that.
Sometimes when im out driving, i just dont want to come back. just wanna drive, and drive, and drive, watch the scenery eventually change, listen to every song i own on the way, thinking about anything and everything, get out at some secluded place and think about how full of God it is, that though not much is seemingly going on there EVERYTHING is going on and God knows everything about it because thats how he is; he cares and thats who he is.
I think about what'll happen if i run out of gas. I'd probably get out and start walking, take what i can carry, what i can live off. After all, if i'd gone that far, why not just keep going?

anyway.
im excited about the future.
im hopeful.
and i dont mean that in an "i wish" sort of way, i mean that in a God sort of way.
:)

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Music-

zee avi
bitter heart,
honey bee,
i am me once more,
first of the gang to die,
darlin' it ain't easy,
just you and me

neutral milk hotel
in the aeroplane over the sea,
holland, 1945,
oh, comely,
two headed boy,
king of carrot flowers

mewithoutYou
every thought a Thought of You,
timothy hay
wolf am i,
c-minor,
o, porcupine,
in a sweater poorly knit,
messes of men.