to god

thank you for putting me where i am
for giving me my friends
for always listening
for motivating me
for taking time to hear about my day
for being patient with me
for not ignoring me
for always knowing the best for me in any situation
for having a plan for me
for supporting my ideas
for always being there
for advising me at all times
for being my hope
for giving me confidence
for believing in me
for understanding me
for letting me truly experience you
for changing me
for helping me realize what i can do to help you
for not giving me more than I can take

you are my GOD

(and i love you)



todays theme music:
moving for the sake of motion- underoath

team lightening!

Today was epic. We went to a Turkey Bowl thing at Grace Church, where you split into teams and play hardcore games like brutal ball and cow tongue football.
Cow tongue football has got to be the best game ever. Our team totally pwned, and i have bloodstains on my shirt and jeans. Gotta love it!
We were team lightening. And we had this little lightening motion thing with our hands :)

Oh and i totally got taken out by a HUMONGOUS ball. When i opened my eyes, people were standing over me like, are you ok? it was pretty hilarious.
And we had a fire pit and roasted marshmallows (i had smores for the first time!) and jumped over fire and walked over hot coals; yknow, all the good stuff.
I'm bruised, I got elbowed in the face and taken out by a gigantic ball and been pounded in the face with a cowtongue- overall a pretty amazing day.


Today's theme music:
this town, a town so obtuse- wesley jensen
what am i to you? - norah jones
dogs can grow beards all over - tdwp

i can handle anything

I have a lot to say.
I just dont know how to say it...

I guess I've been feeling really apathetic about life lately. On saturday I came home and had a breakdown. Things that should really bug me don't, not as much as they should at least. I feel like I'm not accomplishing anything. I feel like I'm not going anywhere.
Times like this, I really like to remember Jeremiah 29:11-12. I can clearly describe God as my Hope. Life sucks sometimes, but the moments are fleeting, and I have something freakin amazing to look forward to after this.

One of the most comforting things ive thought about lately is that God wont give us anything that we can't handle.


On a different note, I'm excited for the small group halloween party! I'm going to be The Ugly One from Teen Girl Squad. (look it up on youtube; its pretty hilarious)
I'm thinking my costume will involve striped tights.



Todays theme music:
President of What? - death cab for cutie
In An Aeroplane Over the Sea- cover by eisley

we needed sunshine...

I just woke up and I cant hear out of my left ear.
weird.


kinda funny that You Are My Sunshine comes out on a super rainy day.
:)





Todays theme music:
on the safest ledge- copeland

how could i not be a christian?

As Shane Claibourne (author/ordinary radical) says, "Jesus always messes up my plans".
Jesus is always messing up my plans too. Its such a weird feeling to have been pulling one way for so long, and then God tells you, "Um. Hey there. What are you doing?"
And you're like, "Remember? This was the plan?"
And God just smiles and says, "Yeah, that was your plan, not mine."

Then you have to start all over.
:)

Someone was saying at small group last night that life would be much easier if you didn't know that God had a plan for you at all, because then you tend to want to make it go your own way and end up having to start all over. again.
I agree.
Actually, life would be easier if we weren't Christians at all. Sure, it sounds easy in the beginning, but it can be pretty difficult. Whoever said that Christianity is easy was sadly mistaken.
I think I have trouble with it because I suck at focusing on God's plan for the day, and not looking ahead. That was one of the first things we learned in the Experiencing God book for small group, but so far its the hardest thing to practice. I'm the kind of person that likes to be able to see the end result and then work up to it.
But you know, one of the best things about God is that He knows whats best for me, because He knows me better than I know myself.
So, in the end, how could i NOT be a Christian?

Its hard, but its totally worth it.




today's theme music:
Everybody Here Is A Cloud - cloud cult
Sunfeet - eisley

i dont mind the weather...

I love the slow soft rain that we sometimes get here.

Isn't it great to wake up in the middle of the night hearing water splashing against your windows?
I always feel so cozy at those moments, because i'm safely inside, and i've got sweaters and blankets.

And then when I get up in the morning, the sky is cloudy and theres a glow in my room thats only there when the sky is overcast, and all the rest of the day I just feel relaxed and close to God, because he created this for me.
:)

cant wait for tomorrow night

a crazy week. im glad its almost over.

We went to visit Clinton last weekend. I have decided that I don't like going to visit clinton. I wish clinton would come visit us. We didn't even talk to him that much, because he didn't really seem like he wanted to talk or spend much time with us. He had to study for a test, and then we didn't get to play around or anything; it was mostly just staying at the hotel watching tv.
lame!

Also, it is really hard (for me at least) to study while I am riding in a car. Which was not a good thing, since I had 3 tests this week. Sunday was probably the worst day, because we had to do a formal dinner in the morning (something for Clinton, i guess), and then drive back here, unpack, then pack again. Because I had to spend the night at a friends house because my aunt had surgery and my mom couldnt drive me to school cause she had to drive my aunt to the hospital. But I was pretty glad that I had to go to my friends house, because with her help I realized that I did all the wrong homework. So thankfully I got all that done, though I had to work into the next morning.
But seriously, I don't know how I would have survived this week in the fine mental state I'm now in if i wasn't a Christian. I can't count how many times i was stressed and frustrated to tears, and had to stop what I was doing for 10 minutes so that I could talk to God and have Him tell me everything's ok. God always makes me feel better, seriously. Go read 1 Timothy and you'll know what I mean...

Oh yeah, and another stressful thing is now gone from my life! Piano lessons have been cut from my weekly routine. I'm not gonna stop playing piano, I just "quit" piano lessons, so its something im going to do on my own, at my own pace.
(ooh i like the sound of that)

But the week still isn't over. And neither is the stress, because tomorrow morning we, as in awana, are having a garage sale at Grace church to raise money for Summit this year. My parents are in charge of it, so I have to go and hold signs and try to sell crap. Anybody wanna buy some junk? Its for a good cause :)